We dated for two years, I didn’t know he was married

 

I met a guy in my second year at campus, he was the kind you would call a perfect boyfriend. We enjoyed life, I introduced him to my friends, family and he did the same just that the family he introduced me to wasn’t complete.

One day we had a fight over what? Not even so important now, anyway he wanted to get us an apartment and we move in together, I told him my parents will not like the idea, I suggested he lets me finish my studies and then I can do that, he turned down my suggestion and we never talked for a week. One day I met his friend and somehow he was also pissed with him. Apparently, my perfect guy wasn’t that perfect after all, he had stabbed his best friend in the back, they had a business proposal together but he had presented it alone to the investors and he didn’t involve his friend. The friend had found out and was so pissed because on the contract, his name hadn’t appeared.

I defended my man in the eyes of his best friend which forced him to prove me wrong, what he told me that evening blew my mind. Unlike girls, men stand by their friends and I was surprised to listen to this guy ‘undressing’ his ‘best friend’. I kept defending him and wishing I was doing the right thing; that this guy was just pissed with him. After arguing with him, he said something to make me shut up.

“Your Steve is married ….” He shouted

“Wow, has it come to this, I thought you guys were friends” I told him. At this point I was tired of all the trash he was saying, I picked up my bag to leave. He held my hand and apologized,

 “This must be too much for you right now, I wouldn’t have said so and am so sorry for lying to you all this long” Are you kidding me, the guy sounded so sure and this is when I woke up. It was late so he offered to drop me at the hostel. Silence filled the ride, a lot was going on through my mind, but the marriage bit had hit me hard. He must have realized what he had done; he had crushed me. When he stopped, I opened the door fast and headed for the gate; he grabbed my hand and gave me a business card. “That’s the wife’s contact, if you think I am lying” I pulled away from him, looked in his eyes and I could tell he was so serious about whatever he was saying.

I locked myself in the room, cried my eyes red. My roommate knocked and I jumped out of my bed, oh no, she can’t see me crying; I tried disguising my swollen eyes for sleep and went to open the door. “Hey sleepy head are you ok?” I looked at her and broke down, she held me and we lay there for like 10 minutes. “Ok baby girl, what’s the issue? Is it about Steve*?” I nodded hoping she will stop, when she insisted for the reason, I gave her the business card.

 “What, are you pregnant?”

“No…what?” I grabbed the card from her

I told my roommate about the evening and the story; she suggested we visit the lady first thing in the morning. By 8:00am we had reached the hospital, my friend registered  as a patient and she went in, her being a mass communication student, she carried on her research and yes it was true, the woman  had three children with ‘my’ Steve. She came out, grabbed my hand and pulled me out, she told me the outcome. I froze for a minute, for two years I was fooled, I was blinded by love and even never cared to dig deeper.

 

After composing myself, I called the woman and our conversation blew my mind

“Hullo” I started

“Hullo, who is this” She responded

“Am sorry to bother you, my name is Tracy*(not real name)…”

“Yes Tracy how can I help you?

My heart beat faster and I chocked on words, “Honestly I don’t know why I have called but…am sorry…”

“Tracy, there is no reason to be sorry, I saw you today at the hospital”

“What?????” Now I started panicking but since the phone was on loud speaker my friend signaled me to continue talking but we were all in shock

“I have known about you for 8 months now, you are dating my husband?

“Madam, am sorry, I didn’t know he was married…I could never break a family…”

“Huh, I figured when I first met you at his office”

“What??? Oh My God” at this point we were all freaking out

“You are not the first victim, I have met others but you sounded so naïve, and today at the hospital, you looked pale I actually thought you were pregnant.”

“No no no, am not pregnant,” I trembled in defense

“Tracy, next time try to find out before you initiate a relationship, my husband is a mess but he is the father of my children and he will never leave me for you or anyone”

This felt better, I was expecting her to be a b***h, mean and she had all the rights to. When she started abusing me, my friend switched off the phone and she texted her, “Madam am sorry and I will not tamper with your husband anymore”

Steve showed up at my door the following evening, I had switched off my phone in fear that his wife will call back. He obliviously denied everything and told me, “If you have another boyfriend, don’t set up accusations just to break up with me.” I looked at the guy in total shock and slammed the door in his face, he bang the door for some time until the security guy came and threw him out.

I wouldn’t call that my Cinderella story but it is my experience with a married man, Steve got another girl in year 2, same course and same hostel as I am in. Sometimes I miss him but I was never raised to break a home. I honestly don’t think I can tell this girl all about the guy because then I will sound jealousy. Am praying she finds out earlier than I did.

To all my girls, a married man can never leave his wife for you. His wife spared my life, she would have done anything to make me pay; burnt me with acid, sent me thugs or bewitched me but she was a good one, I must credit her for that. You might not be this lucky; love yourself so much to walk away in dignity. Everyone has a destiny; taking over someone else’s doesn’t give satisfaction. At the end of the day, he will choose his, wife and children. Cheers to all the ‘My Cinderella family’